So very True - Image by Anne Taintor

So very True - Image by Anne Taintor
I would like this on my very own business cards

Friday, March 26, 2010

I can type.....

Lately I have been feeling like my job skills must not be in demand or that important.  Then I read job postings that say silly things like "must be able to work a fax machine" or "ideal candidate shall be capable of working a multi-line phone."  It makes me wonder: Who is not able to do these things?  These are not rocket science.  These are not skills that one gains by going to college or a trade school.  These are skills that can be taught within the first hour of job training while someone is also showing you the break room, coffee pot and first aid kit.  Come on, really?  Maybe this is part of my problem.  Maybe I do appear to over-qualified.  

I have decided to dumb down my resume and cover letter.  I will revamp it to include intentional errors and misspellings.  Perhaps I make others doubt their own skills.  I mean, who wants to hire an equal in computer skills or language ability.  People do like to feel smart and powerful.  I believe I am on to something.  I will also go back and purposely mess up the formating to look sub-par.  Maybe that way I can at least get a call back.  So disappointing....

Since I will be dumbing down experience I will be focusing on the technical skills that have been acquired in my many jobs.  I will list my amazing skills on my resume and include: typing, 10-key, multi-line phone, fax machine, credit card machine, mop, broom, vacuum, changing rolls of paper-towels in those wall mounted units with a lever,  filling table top napkin dispensers and using a key to unlock a door.  That should really wow 'em.

I took a typing test today and I was a bit unhappy with the results.  I used to be much faster at typing and had higher accuracy but that was a long, long time ago.  That was in the days when I attended a technical college and spent 4 hours a day in typing classes.  We did timed tests, and typing from copy tests, and typing from a transcription machine, and listening to recordings of a man named Cortez Peters, Jr who was supposedly the  fastest typist in the world with perfect accuracy.  I remember it was close to 300 words a minute.  (Sad note* after I wrote this I googled Cortez Peters and found out that the poor guy died like a month after I graduated. RIP and thanks for making those recordings of yourself saying random letters for us to type along with).  

We sat there, me as a teenager, amid women and men of all ages who wanted to learn to type and hold office jobs.  It was like a Korean sweatshop with us crammed in there on those IBM computers utilizing typing programs on windows 3.1 (state of the art it was).  We also had typewriters.  One for each of us in the class. Typing drills, typing tests, typing, the sound of keys being typed, it was actually pure hell at time.  But at least I learned.

Sorry, I am back from my rant now.  I haven't thought about any of that for quite some time.  Anyway, I took a typing test today.  Here is my result:

I guess it could be a lot worse.  I have not seen a job advertised that asks for anything over 60 words per minute so I guess I am still in the game - for now.  This just gives me fodder for later so I will begin taking online typing tests and playing typing games more often to keep up my killer skills.  Of course, I will lie on my resume and state that I only type 30 words per minute.  Hopefully then the hotel I applied at for a front desk job will call me back.....

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