References

Temp Job....

Since I haven't found a job yet--this week marks the first week that I will be helping out a friend at a resort. My friend is the head of housekeeping so I will be in the laundry room.  Not much different than what I do at home on a daily basis. Honestly, I don't mind because I will be out of the house for a few hours.  I have never been in an industrial laundry room so this will be a new endeavor.  Also, the perk to helping my friend is maybe I can finally learn how to fold fitted sheets really well.  I've got towels and flat sheets down pat but fitted sheets always look a tad rounded and funky when they are stashed on a shelf next to their neatly squared-cornered sheet mate.  


The sad part is that I am helping a friend in the laundry room because I don't have a job anymore.  All those stupid diplomas and certifications don't mean anything right now.  Who am I going to impress with them?  "Look towels, I am going to fold you and you are going to like it.  You are going to listen to me and be folded nicely.  Sheets, you too!! You will respect my authority!  You will obey as I try to fold you into squares.  None of this balling up as I fold you, dammit! I graduated high school early. I went to college. I am a certified floodplain manager; certified planner; have my cpr certification and in the 8th grade I took boaters safety and got a certificate for that too.  You, laundry, shall do as I say because I know what I am talking about!"  For some reason I don't think it will matter what I have behind me or on the walls in the office (or in a box right now since I am in the process of moving).  Laundry probably won't care and neither will the people who use that laundry.  Do you think the tourists that stay at the resort will have remarks like "Look Honey!!! This towel was folded neatly into and "E" shape.  The folder is obviously an AICP."  "Oh my, these sheets have been arranged so nicely.  Obviously this was prepared by a college graduate."  Um....No.  Not going to happen.  In the meantime, I will have to forget my pity party as I am moving and will be busy folding laundry. 


Here is a picture of me folding towels.  I am not much of an artist so you will have to pretend those are towels.  Also, I will not be folding towels and sheets in the office as it will be at the resort my friend works at and I will not post all my certificates on the wall.  My picture is not an accurate portrayal of what it will really look like. I assume my hair will be messier and their will be lots of washers and dryers.   

This is News??!?!!!

NOTE:  This is not related to my job search so I am venting.....Hence the different font.  I think I may start a facebook group about this...


I don't care about the Kardashians.  I have only watched their stupid show one time and even then it was for about 2 minutes before I turned it.  I have an anti-famous-for-being-famous-quirk.  If someone is famous it should be for being really excellent or evil.  Not for being rich or for who your parents are or aren't (Nicole Ritchie, Paris Hilton, dingbat Kardashians).  Regardless of how I feel I was taken aback that this was actually a headline on CNN.  Kim Kardashian actually came out and said "I didn't cause plane stench."  WTF????  Now you have me curious, I will read this drivel because that is the most tarded headline I have EVER seen.  The whole article then goes on to say that someone said she had a burrito in first class and it stunk up the plane.  Apparently it bothered Kim so much she had to set the record straight by saying she hates burritos so it wasn't her.  Don't believe me here is a screen shot and a link to the stupid article. 

Guess what...I LOVE BURRITOS!!! If I didn't own a pizza business then I would sell burritos.  If they were people, I might even marry them.  That said: If you love burritos you should not like Kim Kardashian because she hates burritos.  'Nuff said!  Kim Kardashian = Anti-burrito = Un-American!!!

I thought it was Wednesday but it is Thursday

Somedays I can tell that I haven't had a job for a long time. Last week I went to license the utility trailer and all I knew was that it was the 20-something of April. Today I was excited because it was hump-day then I realized it is Thursday. Hump-day isn't so much a hump anymore without a real job but it is the little things in life that keep us sane. Right?

There was one promising job in the paper this morning. I rewrote my resume and cover letter for it and promptly submitted it via email. If I tell you what it was for then I will jinx myself so I won't tell anyone what I apply for anymore--not that I really did that often. I am just tired of being asked "Hey, did you get the job as a tic-tac counter? I just love orange tic-tacs." ME: "No." *then I cry*

There were two jobs on Craigslist that I definitly do not want and would not be good at. One is a chef. I am only good at cooking for my family. In a large restaurant I probably wouldn't do so well. I can however make sloppy joes very excellently and hot dogs. I am good at hot dogs. 

There was also a job posted for an assistant woodworker. That is not one I should try. Ever. I am very clumsy. Honestly.  When I worked in Idaho, I got hurt at work so often that my boss forbid me from filing another worker's comp claim. I am serious. 

Once I fell and broke my butt (later I just found out it was only the tail bone but I still tell people that I fell so hard it cracked my butt). Another time I was sitting at my desk and dropped a pencil. Usually not an eventful action for people. For me it was. See, as I was sitting in my chair I bent forwardish rather quickly to pick the pencil up with my very long arms. Only my arm wasn't as long as I thought and I smacked the bridge of my nose on the edge of the desk. I broke my nose. No shit. Sitting right there at a desk job--I got two black eyes and broke my nose. 

Another time we were posting a job site on a very windy day. So windy in fact that when I reached up to pull the hatch down on the back of the vehicle, the wind caught it and that automatic shutting hatch which normally comes down really slow--not so slow in a 40 mile per hour wind. Smash! It came down on my face and cut the skin off my nose. Actually, I just felt it hit my nose and I keeled over and was like "Oh *#!#" (It actually sounded more like the F-word). Then I yelled to my co-worker who was wondering what the hell was going on as I am bent over screaming "I think I broke my nose and it appears to be bleeding."  He says "Let me see."  I uncupped my hands and showed him.  His face=white.  His response "Oh shit!  You didn't just break it, Nikki.  You cut your nose off!"  That is when he gave me his red fleece vest and told me not to look in the mirror.  He was such a good friend.  He took me to the Emergency Room where I was in luck that it was a clean cut and I had my nose flap glued back on.  He even called my husband -then boyfriend- to tell him where I was.  Also, he didn't mind that I had put blood all over his vest.  He was the best kind of co-worker to have.....

So anyway, maybe that would give you a little perspective as to why I don't think I will be applying for the woodworker position.  I drew a picture of how my first day would go.