Clearing the Air...

Captain's Log:  Week 10, day 5--
I have been officially unemployed for over two and 1/2 months.  I am out here flailing around in unchartered territory.  Others may have visited this area before but they have left no trail behind to help guide me in my exploration. I am not sure how to find my way out.  I was told to apply for jobs and interview.  There are not many jobs out there besides jobs that I would accept only to bide away my time while still looking for other jobs (see earlier post about that, week 1 I believe).  I have been applying  numerous times a week and still it does not appear there is an end in sight.  Oxygen levels are decreasing and I believe my brain may be shrinking due to the lack of stimulation other than reading comics, playing evony and updating my status on facebook.  Afraid it can not last much longer...Need job...Help.  Must have job...
Wondering if my job search is being stymied by an offensive odor mysteriously attached to my application materials.  Much like that time I sent a letter to my boyfriend while he was at basic training and my younger sister thought he must miss me so she took the letter from the mailbox after I put it in there with the flag up and then she sprayed it with like a half-gallon of Aspen perfume (this was in 1991 mind you).  When the letter arrived at the barracks he had to read it and then discard it since it stunk up the sleeping quarters.  They also gave him a new nickname because of it.  I believe they called him Stinky or something much more offensive after that.  I was always afraid to ask what nickname they gave to me after that debacle.  My sister did confess after he asked me to not spray my letters with perfume and I was unsure what he meant.  Has my sister again been lurking around and doing this again?  Maybe this time she is using that fart-smelling air freshener my teenage son has a joke.  Also, how is she attaching that smell to my emails as most of the applications are electronic?  Curious and curiouser...